seems easy,
doesn't it?
i didn't know
what it truly meant.

i didn't know
it meant knowing
you would never truly know
who they are.
were.
would be.

i thought that
friendship was forever
and all those lies they feed you
for the duration of
your childhood.

i didn't know
the ache of
letting go

i never
used to think
that growing up
would be hard

i thought it would
an easy
transformation

i didn't know
how much i would have to
let go of

i thought i would go
from kid to teen
in a second

oh,
how i was wrong

Quiet is the sound of solitude.

Silence is the noise made by peace.

Hushed are the movements of lips as they form a smile.

And I think I like this sound.

Hidden

In the darkness

hidden

In the shadows

hidden

All alone

hidden

I am here, calmly waiting. Waiting for something to happen. Waiting for someone to come.

But no on ever does (why would they?) and I don't expect anyone to. No one should want to. I wouldn't want to either.

I walk alone, bathed in quiet. I stand alone, silence my only partner. My words are hushed, my voice the barest whisper.

I don't really think anyone's really going to find me. I've made sure to stay unseen.

Drifting

sometimes, people disappear. sometimes, they never look back. i didn't look back when i left, and i didn't expect you to care. i guess i didn't expect you to come after me, to hug me, to tell me i'm someone (when in truth, i am no one). i sort of knew you might possibly do it, but you did. and i slowly came back to you. and, sure enough, i drift away again. but you caught me and brought me back. back to you. back to safety.

i think i liked the way you chased me down, took me back, held my heart. but, deep down, i didn't have enough love to return it. so, now, i suppose i'll drift away again.

what a way to live.

Links of Comfort

Depression settles in like a cloaking blackness as the world spins faster. I can't keep up with this, and I have no idea how others do.

But when I feel overwhelmed, I simply go to my list of sites that makes me feel better.


This is where I go when I need some quiet: http://thequietplaceproject.com/thequietplace?page=&lang=

This is where I go when I need a hug an some comfort: http://www.thenicestplaceontheinter.net/

This is where I go when I'm sad and need something to match my emotions: http://www.rainymood.com/

This is where I go when I need reassurance that everything is okay: http://make-everything-ok.com/

This is where I go when I need a reminder that the world is very abstract and beautiful: http://anasomnia.com/

This is where I go when I need to remember Harry: http://www.yooouuutuuube.com/v/?width=192&height=120&yt=PLL5MRijzI8&flux=1&direction=rand

This is where I go when I need to stargaze: http://neave.com/planetarium/app/

Feel free to visit these links, and if they make you feel better, pass them on.

Silence

I am alone in this place

I am alone, I am disgraced

I cannot be seen, I cannot be heard

I cannot say a single word


All the tumbling words and noises

Screeches, whimpers, many voices

Joined in a tidal wave

To sound we all have become slave


Day and night my ears will bleed

Quiet is just what I need

A cry of anguish, mournful bray

I wish for silence every day